The New Year

This time last year, I was in a dark place. I was bitter about having 2 additional losses in 2010 and not that hopeful for 2011. I am amazed at how much can change in a year. I celebrated the New Year sleeping with my daughter next to my bed. No exciting countdown, no confetti, no slinky dress, no big bash, just some quiet sleep for me and my daughter.  =)

She is three months and growing so quickly. She smiles at us and talks to us in the morning. She loves sitting on her daddy's chest (best way for her to poop), looking at herself in the mirror, and even giggled for the first time in front of the mirror. She can roll onto her side from her back, hit her toys, grab them, and loves looking at the colors on her play mat.

We read to her, I'm reading her one element per night from the periodical table of elements book, we play together, we snuggle, she naps on me (and I love it), she makes a thousand expressions, and I am enjoying all of my time with her. I pushed back my return to work date by two weeks, but it is still not enough. I want to spend as much time with her as possible.

I am really hoping to be a SAHM. DH and I talked about working our finances so that it is at least a possibility and is open to discussing it more (yay!). I just hate the thought of taking her to daycare and missing out on so many of her firsts. What if she misses me? What if she thinks I've abandoned her? What if she forgets who I am?! I cry just thinking about it.

She is currently sleeping on my lap with her hands behind her head. She is in that phase where she gets the sleep smiles. Cutest.thing.ever. Her mouth is slightly open and she has baby snores. I could just watch her sleep all day. I still can't believe how blessed I am to have her here with me. I am so excited to spend this year with her. Here is to a great 2012!